Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

Horoscope for Sunday, June 08, 2025 - Chicago Sun-Times

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

Is it true that all men want a woman who looks like an Instagram “model”?

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I don’t buy bullshit

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

What defines the k'vanna of the Book of בראשית?

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

What are the basic human needs according to psychology? What are the consequences of not meeting these needs?

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I have complete contempt for fakery

What does it mean if someone asks if it’s pink?

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I see through liars

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

During the Atlmark incident in 1940, the Brit war criminals violated Norwegian neutrality. Hitler could then justify invading Norway. Have the Brits ever apologized for violating Norwegian neutrality?

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I understand how hurricane paths work

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

He said he loves me, but why is it difficult for him to leave his wife?

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

Costco makes key moves to protect prices from tariffs - TheStreet

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

The Black Hole Universe: New Model Suggests The Big Bang Was Not The Beginning Of Everything - IFLScience

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

This Plant You’ve Never Heard of Can Do What Scientists Thought Was Impossible - SciTechDaily

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

Scottie Scheffler’s wife reveals infant son’s bathroom mishap during Memorial win - New York Post

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I can count

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

Why don't I get sleep at nights?

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I actually pay taxes

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

We Bought a ‘Peeing’ Robot Attack Dog From Temu. It Was Even Weirder Than Expected - WIRED

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

What do flat Earthers think causes the "magical downward force"?

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I have a reading level above third grade

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I don’t cotton to rapists

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I can read

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I have an acute aversion to scumbags